Archive for March, 2007

Dreaming of a long, hot Summery

March 21, 2007

Second Life

In a tragic admission, Linden Lab announced that it does not have enough volunteers to process volunteer applications in a timely manner. If you would like to volunteer to help the existing volunteers process the backlog of volunteers applications then you should … um … no, wait. Let me think. Yeah. I’ll get back to you on this one.

Second Citizen

In a sneaky, in-world move reported here and discussed to death here Linden Lab decided to clamp down on the sort of stuff that some people do that gets other people all bent out of whack as soon as stuff like that is mentioned.

In an effort to cast some light on the practice known as ageplay, this blogger interviewed a leading ageplayer. For the purposes of this interview this person will be referred to as ‘Tiny’. This is yet another emotive issue and this blogger has done everything possible to keep personal feelings at bay. If you are easily offended by the sort of stuff that easily offends you then read no further.

<blogger>: Good Evening
<’Tiny’> : A-wah. A-goo-goo. Wah ?
<blogger>: Hmm. So perhaps we could talk about ageplay in SL. How did you get involved ?
<’Tiny’> : HAHAHAHA. *gurgle* Wa-wa-wa-wa-waaaaah.
<blogger>: Sorry, I didn’t catch a word of that. Perhaps if you took your toes out of your mouth it would help.
<’Tiny’> : *coff* *gurgle* Awoooooooooooooooo. *hic*
<blogger>: What ? Look, I’ll give you this piece of candy if you’ll answer a question. Here it iz. Oh yez-it-iz. Candy for T-i-i-i-i-i-ny.
<’Tiny’> : *giggle* aha aha aha aha *coff*
<blogger>: So, about ageplay in Second Life and Linden Lab’s response to it.
<’Tiny’> : *pfft*
<blogger>: What ? OK. Just one more piece. You’ve already got chocolate all over your fingers. H-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-re it comes. Oh, yezitdoes. Duzzee like that, ooooh duzzee ?
<’Tiny’> : *hic* HAHAHAHAHAHA ! Wah. Agooo. Agoooo. Agooo.
<blogger>: If we could perhaps get back to the topic at hand now. Ageplay in SL. Presumably you are in favour of it.
<’Tiny’> : Bah!
<blogger>: Bah ? You’re against it ? I have to say that that rather surprises me.
<’Tiny’> : wah wah Wah Wah WAH WAH WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
<blogger>: Oh dear. What’s wrong ? Do you feel ….
<’Tiny’> : *barf*
<blogger>: Oh GAH!
<’Tiny’> : *barf*
<blogger>: You just threw up on my sweater.
<’Tiny’> : b-b-b-b-b-BAH! Agoo. Agoo. AWAAAAAH
<blogger>: You little shit! This is cashmere ! Do you know how much cashmere costs ?
<’Tiny’> : POOOOOOOOOOOOOH !!!

There you have it. These people are disgusting and should be banned immediately.

Phreak Radio …

… bids a sad farewell to the DJs Arahan Claveau and Nebulosus Severine. This blogger can only hope that this is a brief hiatus and that they return in the future.

Something of a Summary

March 14, 2007

Second Life

In what has been termed ‘the most important development in Second Life since the 1.7 update’ integrated voice chat is imminent.

Opinions are divided as to the desirability of this feature so, in an attempt to put certain rumours to rest, this blogger tested it out on the Beta Grid.

What follows is a transcription of the bits this blogger could remember.

<avatar 1> Hello ? Hello ?
<avator 2> Hi. How are you ?
<avatar 3> Woah, this is cool.
<avatar 1> Hello ? Hello ?
<avatar 2> *crackle* *hiss* *pop*
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<avatar 1> Hello ? Hello ?
<avatar 4> Turn your volume up.
<avatar 2> Hi … um … who said that ?
<avatar 5> How make money in SL ?
<avatar 3> Way cool !!
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<avater 1> Hello ? Hello ?
<avater 4> Who’s echoing ? (echoing echoing echoing)
<avatar 2> You are (you are you are you are)
<avatar 3> So are you (are you are you are you)
<avater 1> Hello ? Hello ? (hello hello hello hello)
<avatar 4> Wait, you’re using your PC speakers aren’t you ? (aren’t you aren’t you)
<avatar 2> Wait. Let me re-log.
<avatar 6> Merde. Tu es vraiment le plus grand con du monde.
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<avatar 7> Me so horny. Me love you long time.
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<William Shatner sound sample at ear splitting volume>
<avatar 3> This is so cool.
<avatar 8> Wer hat das gesagt ?
<avatar 1> Hello ? Hello ?

Second Citizen

Exciting news. SC now comes with added BLING !!

Oh yes, and a whole bunch of people shouted at each other for various reasons. Go read it yourself.

Phreak …

.. will soon have new DJ booths !!

(This blogger has been forced to sign a punitive NDA regarding Phreak developments and cannot say anything else at this stage.)